Sunday, October 25, 2009

sitting and thinking

Dear Diary,
I am sitting here with my daughter watching a movie that we have seen over and over again... and I start thinking... about my life about the life I want. I feel like a childish little girl thinking the way I do. I am thinking about my prince charming. The man that is going to sweet me off my feet.. the man who will take all my pain away. The man that will make me happy. Is this just a fantasy that will soon dissolve like so many other one? Is it wrong to want that type of love or even thinking that type of love is possible? Is that type of relationship even possible? Where a man and woman have such a deep bond and a deep love that they can get thru anything. That both are mutually happy 99% of the time? Where the relationship is equal. Where the man is willing to do for the woman as much as she is willing to do for him?
I just want a companion. I want a man that will be there for me no matter what. That when I am sick or depressed or whatever, he will be there for me, he will help me and make me better. He will be there for me and for my kids. He will help me. period.
Is that to much to ask for? Just to be loved? To be cherished. To receive what I give?

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