My heart breaks for my baby girl almost daily. I try not to think about it. Think about the fact that she barely knows her father. The fact that it seems that everyone and everything else is more important to her daddy... than she is. I worry for her. Worry for what this is going to do to her. Worry for how she is going to understand and internalize all of this when she is older.
For now.. its just life. This is how it always has been. She see's her father, when I her mother takes her to his job to see him... She see's her father when he comes by the house once in a very very very great while... mainly to see me... her mother... because he wants me back. He wants his family back..Yet... He could have a family at any time... he could have a daughter in his life whenever he wanted.. He could feel that unconditional love almost daily... if he wanted. But he doesn't.
I worry for her that she will think this is they way a man is supposed to be.
I worry for her that she will think this is they way a father is supposed to be.
I worry for her that she will think this is her fault.
I worry for her that she will feel she is not good enough.
And I pray. And give it to God.
I remind her daily of how wonderful she is.
I remind her that he daddy does love her.
I remind her that she is a beautiful, special little girl.
I remind her that her True Father God Loves HER.
I try and be enough for her, to be both mommy and daddy for her. To shower her with so much love that we won't notice the lacking of it that she receives from her father.
Blessings N Love