I went shopping yesterday for my birthday with my mom and my kids. The one thing I really wanted was a grown up bra, like from
Secret.. A nice fancy lacy type pretty bra.
I always just buy my bras at walmart- in the little girl “training bra”
section. Yes, the little girl/teeny bopper section is where I shop for my bras.
I am that small when it comes to my girls.
So I figured, if I go to VS, I could get fitted and since their bras are
a higher quality- I should be able to find something that I like. Victoria
UGH. NOPE. WRONG!!
I tried on at least 10 different bras. 8 different styles and 2 different sizes!!
NOTHING. FIT. RIGHT!!!! AND.
To say the least, it was very very very frustrating and depressing.
I left there feel really crappy about my self.
Standing there in front of a mirror for 45 minutes… half naked, in lighting that shows every imperfection trying on bras that are sexy, and they just make me look like there is something wrong with me. I wanted to cry. I still want to cry.
I told a friend how I felt and she told me I was crazy. I have a great body.
I am not saying that its horrible. All I am saying, ITS NOT WHAT I WANT. I want to be able to look in the mirror and say – wow. I look good.
Why is it that just because I am skinny… that it is assumed that I should be happy with the way my body looks. I am not. I don’t mind the stretch marks and the lil extra fluff in some areas… but when everything is just blah to me when I look in the mirrior… why is that so horrible?? Why am I not aloud to just have a day where I can be upset with the way I look. Most days, I am ok… but last night. I wasn’t.
I am just overwhelmed today. Feeling inadequate.
I know it will get better. I know I am beautiful. I know I am a child of God.
I have faith.
Blessings N Love