Wednesday, June 5, 2013

struggling this week

I am going to try and post every day or every other day on here from now on... I want to share the ups and downs of being unemployed and now a stay at home mom until I find another job.

This week has been a struggle for me.
I feel like I have been running around crazy for the last 3 days... it seems like there is always something  that needs to be done.. All last week, I worked on cleaning the house and doing laundry. The week before I was cleaning up the outside and getting ready for the cook out that we had. This week, its been one appointment after another after another.  Yesterday I went in to file for food and medical assistance, I had to go with my mom for something for her, lil man had a orthodontist appointment and then baseball at 530 till after 9pm.  I was gone almost all day. Plus I had to find time to get the stuff together to go back to the human services office for the food and medical assistance today, get the kids teachers gifts together since today is there last day of school.  Non. Stop.

Today, I went back up to human services with everything I thought I needed, but of course I was missing a couple things. So now I have to get all that together and get it back to them.  After that I ran to baby girls end of the year party and watched the kindergarten graduation, then headed to little man's school for their end of the year party. I have about a 45 minute break right now before I have to leave to go to my depression doc appt.  Non- Stop.

Last night it all kinda caught up with me. I had a headache, wasn't feeling the greatest and was in a horrible mood. I got into it with my boyfriends thinking he was having an attitude with me... but really he wasn't. We did talk it out and things seemed to be resolved.  But this morning I asked if he was coming over tonight and he said "idk".  I went from fine to no in 0.3 seconds. That is not like me at all.
I don't know. Maybe I am just over thinking things (shocker right?). Just seems like since I have been unempoloyed things have changed. Maybe its just be because I am insecure and uncertain of whats going to happen now that I am not working. The lady today told me that I may not qualify for medical assistance because with unemployment and child support, I may make too much.. How messed up is that???!!! lol.

Tomorrow will be the first day of summer vacation for the kids.. so hopefully I will be able to get us on some kind of routine and hopefully I won't feel like I am losing my mind about everything.

I know God has a plan for me... and I really need to get back into my special quiet time with Him again.. I have slacked on that, the past few weeks with not working, and honestly even before that I was starting to slack. I need to get back to Him being my main focus again.

Blessings N Love
Overthinking Mama

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