Wednesday, February 11, 2009
I got baptized this past Sunday. It was a great experience. But truthfully my mood has been up and down ever since... I have been very happy at times and then just sad other times. I am not really sure the completely reasons why either. I think part of it may be that there was one specific person that I was hoping (even tho i really knew he wouldnt show up) would show up or at least talk to me at some point in the day and he did not... and I know I shouldnt base my happiness of this day on person unfortunately i couldnt help but be saddened by it. Also I think i am scared of failing. I am scared that I will end up the person I used to be. I have no intentions of being that girl i was... but I think that thought is in the back of my head also. Over all tho. I really am glad I went thru with it. I feel so blessed that Our God is so great to give me this "second" chance with my life... I know he has great plans for me and my future... I can't wait to see what they are... One thing that happened that night after my baptism... When i finally went to bed... I was tossing and turning, having too many thoughts running thru my mind. finally i feel asleep... and I had a bad dream. When I woke up from my dream I looked up towards my ceiling and my door and there was a lil devil looking spider looking creature there... it frightened me slightly. I started praying and praying... and if finally crawled up into my attic it looked like or just disappeared... This isnt the first time I have seen something like this... something similar actually happened right after I got saved... I know the devil has to work even harder to try and get me back now... and he will be in for the fight of his life!