Life

Well I have been married now for almost 3 weeks... Everyone keeps asking me: So do you feel different now that you are married?. The honest answer is really no.  The MR. and I were already living a "married" life. We lived together. Had kids together. Did life together. I don't feel guilty about this now tho.. so I guess that's a difference. I don't have to feel guilty for having a child out of wedlock. I don't have to feel guilty for living in sin with a man I wasn't married to. I don't have to feel guilty for having sex with a man I wasn't married to. All of this has definitely been a weight lifted off of my shoulders. 
This seem to have calmed down now too. I don't feel as stressed about getting everything thing together for the wedding. That on top of being a mom, working, trying to run a household seriously was wearing me down. Don't get me wrong. I still have my moments where I get stressed out, but not like I did a few weeks ago.  I am hoping over the next few months things settle down even more and we fall in to a good routine with working, school, after school things, family, and other things in life.  
Last night was such a wonderful night. We didn't have anywhere to go. Didn't have anything to do. So we were able to just enjoy each other. We snuggled up on the couch after dinner and watched The Voice. It was good. 
I started a new job last week. I am a secretary for a church. The pay isn't much and the drive is far, but it is a job and I am hoping that maybe it will teach me new things, and eventually lead to something better. I still have my other job at the Nursing Home. I work both jobs part time which is nice cuz then I still get to be home with the kids most of the time and if I am not there then the MR. is. We also have his grandma and my mom babysitting baby M during the days while I am at the church job. So she is always with family.

Hopefully I will be able to start posting more... "fingers crossed"

Blessings N Love
Overthinking Mama

the count down...

It is the final week as a "single" woman.

I am getting married on Saturday.

and truth be told... I am a little scared!!

Not so much of the wedding or any of that- tho yea, I am worried that things will go wrong but thats part of life. lol

I am scared of the unknown. Scared that things will change once we say I Do.  Scared that temptation will get the better of us and cheating will happen.  

I don't want to get married, just to end up in divorce again. I've been there. Its not good.

I am worried that I won't be good enough as a wife.

I have this fear that "karma" will come back and bite me in the butt since I cheated on my first husband... that I divorced him... that I didn't try with him.  That because I hurt him so badly, that I will end up being hurt too.

B is an amazing man.  I now he wouldn't do anything to hurt me, yet. yet, I still am sitting here worried.  I guess I worry because of my past.  Because of my insecurities.

I have to put it all in God's hands.  I have to give all my worry and concern over to Him. He is the one in control. He is the one who will be by me no matter what.  I need to believe that no matter what happens, He will be with me, and will work everything out for His good.

Blessings N Love
Overthinking Mama

Busy. Busy. Busy... oh and did I say busy???

It has been a insanely busy few months!!!

Between normal life, being pregnant, doc appointments for me/baby, the baby shower, figuring things out for the wedding, and work... we also added getting custody of my fiance's little cousin.  So add in court appointments, home study, backround checks, making sure she's up to date on doc visits and dentists, therapists coming to our house to make sure she's adjusting to everything alright... its been crazy... but honestly I wouldn't change any of it for the world!! 

Now we are getting ready  for baby M to come... the wedding... and back to school!!! Yay!!!

My due date is the 15th of August.  They have me scheduled for an induction on the 14th... so I guess we are just playing it by ear till then.  I have been having contractions but nothing consistant. Tho last Sunday I went to the hospital because I just really didn't feel well and was having very bad lower belly pains... it seriously felt almost like there was a knife cutting me from the inside. But I was pretty much told that its normal and only if they are unbearable, my water breaks, or my contractions are very consistant to come back... otherwise... I'll be fine. :-( So its all in God's hands.

I have one more day of work till I am off for maternity leave. I am looking forward to being able to be home more, but we really need the $$. I am trying to get parties set up for Damsel in Defense, but its pretty hard, plus lately I haven't really had the energy to market myself and the company like I should but I think once the baby comes, God willing, I will have more energy and motivation, and wont have this huge belly getting in my way all the time.

We have about a month and a half till our wedding... and I have yet to get the invites mailed out. I am thinking about doing a Facebook event for at least the people on facebook so they will know and I can get an idea for how many people will be coming.  It just hurts to even write out address on envelopes. My hands are swollen and sore... I just finished up doing the thank you's for the baby shower!! lol

I think we pretty much have everything thing done and taken care of for the arrival of baby M. I am planning on breast feeding... not sure for exactly how long... but I want to give it a shot at least. I didn't with the other two, which I don't regret, but I wanted to try with this one especially since I am not working full time.

Well I need to get up and get moving. Need to finish cleaning up the house... and hopefully the back yard too.

It has felt so good to get on here and actually write something. I really need to do this more often. Its very relaxing for me.  I also want to say thank you for all of my readers!!

Blessings N Love
Overthinking Mama 

Craziness

I know many times that I have said how crazy life is right now.... well I think so far this summer takes the cake!!!  And other than one thing... I wouldn't change anything else for all the money in the world!!!

We are in the process of getting custody of my Fiance's cousin. She is 5 and the sweetest little girl!! She has been staying with us since the beginning of June. She fits in like she's always been here.  I really couldn't imagine her not being here.
We were trying to get her siblings too. She has an older sister and a younger brother, but sadly financially and also logistically we weren't able to...  6 kids in a 3 bedroom, 1000 sqft home (4 girls in one bedroom), was just a little bit too tight.  Plus there were some other things that were determined for the benefit for all the kids so we only were able to get here.

In the past month that she has been here, we have had multiple dentist appointments, doctor visits, social workers, counselor, voice for children advocate come by and visit, visitation up at children services with her mom and siblings... its been busy to say the least. But again, I wouldn't change it at all.

The pregnancy so far is going great.  Been having contraction off and on, but thats normal.  I have 7 more weeks to go!!! I have been going to physical therapy for the last 4 weeks because of the intense back pain I was having. It has been a life saver!!

Our baby shower is in a few weeks. I am excited. Two of my wonderful friends are throwing it for us. :-)   I am due August 15.  Our wedding will be Sept 20th.

We have had baseball Monday thru Friday- every single evening! lol.  That has stopped for lil man. Baby girl still has it going on 2x a week for the rest of the month.

Trying to think about what else has been going on... I really don't know.

I started with two different direct sales companies...
Perfectly Posh and Damsel in Defense. I am really really excited about these companies... esp the Damsel in Defense. Check out my sites if you get a chance.
www.perfectlyposh.com/10126

and

www.mydamselpro.net/safersarah

Well thats all for now... I need to get a lot done around here today, including a Rules list, a chore chart and bathing my doggies!!!

Blessings N Love
Overthinking Mama

ps.with the new additions to the family- I will be switching around Nicknames. :-)

Marriage reminder...

I saw this on a friends facebook this morning.  This is a good reminder. Just simple little things that we can do to help strengthen a marriage or even just a relationship. Amazing how sometimes the first 3 things are forgotten quickly by both parties and we then end up feeling like something is missing or our spouse doesn't love us like they used too...  We need to make it a priority to love on our spouse... not just love them but show them our love physically. (and not just sex!)

Blessings N Love

Overthinking Mama

Happy Mother's Day!!

Wishing every one who is a mom to a human or an animal... is a father who has to take on the moms role, or is a mom to be... 



Happy Mother's Day!!!!! 




Blessings N Love 
Overthinking Mama 

Catch up...

I can't believe its been so long since I last blogged. Ugh. I have had the desire... just no motivation or time. Things have been busy around here or at least my mind has been. lol.

I have been fighting a sinus infection for the last couple months. Sudafed seems to help here and there, but not continuously. :-( So I have been dealing with horrible headaches on and off including a lovely one that I have had for the last 3 days.

We are trying to get everything prepared and set and all that for the wedding. We have decided on Sept 13 for the date. Now we just have to figure out where exactly.  I am getting excited tho. I already have my dress. We are on a very very tight budget... like $1000 or less. :-) I know we can do it tho!!! :-)

I am 19/20 weeks prego right now... and hopefully we get to find out if its a boy or a girl on Wednesday. Everyone is thinking girl... I am really feeling boy. I don't care either way since I have one of each... but I dunno... just have this feeling its a boy. I even dreamed last night that it was a boy. lol.  So I guess we will see.... Now I just have to find a cute way to announce it to the world!! :-)

The pregnancy so far hasn't been too too bad. Other than the sinus infection lately, its not bad. Tiredness mostly. Still dealing with depression, but I guess its not as bad as it could be if I wasn't taking anything for it.
The baby moves around like crazy. I don't think he stops moving ever. lol. It takes my breath away at times and makes my heart pound... literally! lol.

I have started a second part time job as a receptionist at a nursing home. I love it so far. Everyone there is so wonderful.  My other part time job is still going good. The hours are more sporadic than I would like, but I can't complain. She works with my schedule and I am so thankful for that.

I started going back to classes for ministry. I love it. I can't wait to see what and where God leads me!! I really want to get into some sort of counseling. :-)

The kiddo's are doing great!!!  I think they are getting a little stir crazy waiting for the weather to break.... seems like it will never stop snowing!!! GGRRR!!!

I am looking into starting up my own "home party" business. Its something that God has put in my mind for years... and I never really went for it... but I think/hope/pray that this is the year... and it will be a success!! :-)

I think thats pretty much the major parts of life right now. lol.  I feel a little better getting caught up here some and finally posting.  I'd say I'll do better... but I can't promise anything.

I will def post soon what the gender is!! :-)

Blessings N Love
Overthinking Mama