Day 4.

Day 4: Something you have to forgive someone for.

Hhhmmm…

I am normally pretty good about forgiving people of things… Thou, I don’t know, maybe I’m not. I still feel hurt and anger over the things that they have done… but I don’t throw it back in their face what they have done or how they have hurt me… except for one person.

My daughters father. For the hurt he’s caused me, I forgive him. I still hurt from it… but what’s done is done and I am a better person now for it.

But the one thing I have trouble forgiving him for… How he is to our daughter.  

I try and forgive him for not seeing her, but when its something that is constant, its really hard to. 

He hasn’t seen her for more than 10 minutes since July 4^th.  The only time’s he has seen her since then is her 1^st day of school, when he’s been driving by in his work truck (while working), or when I take her up to his work to see him.  He rarely calls to see her and never asks for her. 

Monday he sent me a message asking me what she was doing on Tuesday. I replyed- spending the day with you. Assuming that is the reason why he asked- he wanted to see her. He replyed with ill have to see if I am working or not. I never heard back from him. I text him a couple times during the day and called him ( I needed to know if I should let the sitter know if she will be there or not) and I never got a response. 

This is the way it always is. The last time he has taken his daughter, I believe was Easter. Maybe once after that, I can’t remember.  I am tired of always trying to force him to see his daughter… but I also probably won’t stop.

I try and forgive him for this. And I do. Then he does it again.