Friday, July 29, 2011

Realization Friday

Thank goodness its Friday!!!! I am so happy about that!!!  Its been a long week.. not bad in the least.. just long. 

My Lil Man is going to his dads this morning.. Baby Girl is going to see her Aunt Katie with my dad and step mom for the weekend. Its just me!!! Just ME!! I couldn’t tell you the last time I had a full JUST ME 2 days. Its always maybe a night. Maybe 2 nights but I always have one of my kids back for a few hours before the 2nd night happens. I don’t think I have ever had a full weekend with no kids.. I just really don’t know what I am going to do with myself!!!  I am already missing them both like crazy.. and of course I am worrying about them already. But I have said my prayers of protections over them… and I have to trust in the Lord on that.  

Tomorrow I am having a birthday party for my best friends Joshy. J This will be the 4th year we have done this! I love it. Its always so much fun!!! I can’t wait. My wonderful mom is making some wonderful food for it.  (she spoils me!!)

Well its time for the realizations for the week!!!

I’ve come to realize:

~ that life aint always the way you think it should be…but it’s the way that God wants it to be based on your decisions in life.

~  that certain ex’s are ex’s for a reason… a dang good reason… and because of that reason why the heck would I want to be with that ex again??!!

~ that if you have a girl friend and are trying to tell me that I have your heart and you will do whatever it take if I will give you another chance… yea.. sorry dude..  I can do better.. oh wait. I am.

~  that I hate leaving messages

~ that I hate even more when people don’t leave me messages.

~ that running your ac everyday for 2 weeks can cause an insane electric bill!!

~ that my story is still be written.

~ that I need to get off my butt and get signed up for classes. Ugh.

~ that I need to get off my butt and get baby girl signed up for preschool!

Happy Friday Ya’ll. Have a great and safe weekend!!

Blessings N Love
Overthinking Mama 

Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Help Wanted...

I am going out of town for a week in August.  I would love to have guest posts done to post during my vacation. If you would be interested in doing a guest post, please let me know. It can be about pretty much anything you would like- just keep it family friendly. :-) 

Thanks ya'll

Blessings N Love
Overthinking Mama

my tattoos are featured!!

Please go over to Life Of a Mombie and check out her Tattoo Talk featuring... ME!!!! 

Blessings N Love
Overthinking Mama 

Friday, July 22, 2011

Realization Friday

Its that wonderful time again… It’s realization Friday!!!

Ok… well the power went out for a total of 2.4 seconds… and that line up there…was the only thing that saved. Ggrrr. Stupid computer. Stupid storm.

Anywho.. once again. The realizations:

Ive come to realize:

~ That if I don’t put in the effort- no effort will be put in.

~ that if you run a business from your home and your cell phone service sucks there… invest in a land line phone!!!

~ people are annoying.

~ God is so good.

~ Tuesday is the best day for my blog, I always have the most views that day.

~ I love my twitter friends

~ I love my blogging friends

~ I weight 3 lbs more now than I did in highschool!! 11yrs later!!

~ God is good!

Have a great weekend ya’ll!!!

Blessings N Love
Overthinking Mama 

Just a lil story.

As I sit here staring out the window I wonder what she’s doing. I wonder if she’s thinking about him as much as I am. I wonder if they are together. I can’t think about that. I just can’t… Crap. I did. I try and hold back a sniffle. I try and discreetly wipe away that tear. I can’t cry over him. He chose who he wanted. I hope no one sees me crying. I don’t want their sympathy. I don’t want their questions. It’s my own fault. I knew I would never be good enough for him.  But why did he act like he cared then?? Why did he make me feel like I had a chance?!  I wish he would have just kept on ignoring me. I wish I wouldn’t have been in the library that day.  Man. I remember that day like it was yesterday.
It was like every other Sunday. I was at the library studying for my classes. It was a cold Sunday. It was raining hard. I was sopping wet by the time I walked from my dorm room.  I hated that I couldn’t study in my own room. But Christy always had someone over. They were always giggling about boys… or about me.  And my big glasses or my frizzy brown hair. How I would never have a boyfriend and would probably be an old cat lady. They didn’t care if I could hear them. I learned to tune them out most of the time. But I tried to stay away as much as possible anyway.  Well thinking back.. I guess it wasn’t like every other Sunday. Christy was crying this Sunday.  Her friends were there comforting her. Jack just broke up with her.  Secretly I was happy. It’s what she deserved. She was so snobbish when it came to him, expected him to cater to her every demand. It was pathetic. I felt sorry for him.  And he was so hot. Had to definitely be the hottest guy I had ever seen, but then again, I came from an all girl’s school.
That Sunday I was sitting there minding my business and Jack came in. He sat at the table right next to me, not even noticing or glancing my way. Why should he. I am just a nerd.  He was studying too.. He kept stopping and putting his head in his hands… then he started talking to himself, saying he just will never get this stuff.  I don’t know what came over me… but I spoke up. I asked him what he was having problems with. He replied algebra. I told him I could help him with that. I love algebra. Yea he looked at me like I was crazy. It was fine. He looked at me.  I moved over to his table and we chatted. I explained. It was wonderful.   Then he said he had to go, thanks.  And he was gone.
The next Sunday I went to the library again with the hopes he would be there. Christy was on to the next boy. Well sorta. She said she was doing it just to make Jack jealous. I hoped it wouldn’t work.  I sat there at my table trying to study, but every time the door opened I had to look up with hopes he would be there… finally he was. He was so happy. He ran over to my table and told me that he got a B on his test. He’s never got a B before. He said he owed me a pizza at least.  So we went to a lil pizzeria off campus. I knew he didn’t want to be seen with me. He denied it though.  We chatted all night long. I told him about my childhood and the all girls’ school. How my mom was an alcoholic and my dad just ignored everything especially me because I was too much like my mom. He told me about how his mom shot herself when he was 2 because his little brother drowned in the bath tube while she was supposed to give him a bath. She went to the hall to grab her cigarettes and when she got back, it was too late.  I know I sat there like a little school girl with a huge smile on my face the whole time. It was a dream come true.  When we left, he asked if I would continue to help him with his algebra. We could meet at the pizzeria every Sunday and study. Of course I agreed.  Soon the every Sunday turned into Sundays and Wednesdays and I was helping him with his French too.  He would put his arm around me and cuddle with me while we were studying.  And then it happened… we were just chatting and he looked at me. stared deep into my eyes. He gently put his hand on my chin and moved my face towards his and he kissed me.  It was my first kiss and it was wonderful.  We kept kissing. It felt so good. He said we should leave, go somewhere to be alone.  I said ok. My head was still spinning that someone kissed me… not just someone JACK kissed me!!  ME!!  
We got in his car and went to the lake. He parked right on the beach and turned the radio on.  He looked at me again and then kissed me… he kept kissing me and his hand moved from my shoulder to my breast… oh if felt so nice, I didn’t want him to stop so I told him not to.  
That night I lost my virginity, in the back of his Ford Focus. And it was wonderful. And he never spoke to me again.  It still hurts.  After that night Christy and Jack were back together. He comes up to our room all the time. He acts like I don’t even exist. I guess its all back to reality.  I can’t help but think about it. Wonder if I even meant anything to him. In my head I did. In my reality I didn’t.

Blessing N Love
Overthinking Mama

Thursday, July 21, 2011

My- MAMA Style

My- MAMA Style

Sweater shirt- Charlotte Russe- 15.99
Undertank- Charlotte Russe- 12.99
Bramudas- Charlotte Russe- 21.99
Shoes- Thirfted $3.99

Blessings N Love
Overthinking Mama 

Wednesday, July 20, 2011

Hot Stove Tournament Game

Lil Man Pitching

took one for the team... got hit with a ball with batting- walk to first

my bff brought her doggie to the game! :-) 
Sadly- We lost this game. But it was a great season. The team improved so much from the very first game!!! I can't wait for next year!!! 

Blessings N Love
Overthinking Mama 

changing men

I seriously get annoyed when someone comes up to me and asks if I am still with that one guy… I tell them no.. and they are like Dang girl, you change men like you change underware!!  

Really?? Why don’t you step down off your high horse and take a look into my life.

In the last 5 ½ years I have dated 4 people.  The first guy was my daughters father. We were together for a year and a half. HE LEFT ME!!  He got a job after 9 months unemployed and left me when baby girl was 6 months.

The next guy… a year after me and baby girls dad broke up… dated for a total of 3 monhts. In that 3 months time I learned he was a liar, a cheater, and a druggie. Sorry not good for my kids.

The next guy- one of my BFF’s. I knew him for 3 years before this.  We wanted to see if it would work since we were bff’s.  He’s an awesome guy, but we just were at different points in our life and couldn’t seem to get it all together just right. He is still one of my close friends.

The next guy- I met 4 months after my bff.  It was fate we met. He was awesome. The kids loved him. Treated me pretty good. Made me feel things I have never felt ever. But he had his issues and because of it I ended up with mine… and it didn’t work out… But we tried for over a year.  

So yea, I have dated a few guys. But once I see that a man aint good for me or my kids… sorry but he’s gone.  I am not going to stick around with a guy just because everyone is going to look at me funny cuz I ended another relationship. And with some people, you don’t know what they are truly like until you are in a relationship with them.

I pray over every relationship and let God guide me in where it goes. My kids come first over anyone or anything. Period.

Blessings N Love
Overthinking Mama

Tuesday, July 19, 2011

no inspiration

Well I am back.. sorta… tho I still really have no inspiration for writing.  So this will probably be all really random.

I have realized over the past couple days… how crazy I am. Lol.
And insecure.

I don’t know what the future holds… but I am kinda just in neutral at the moment… floating along in this thing called life.

I really need to get pics of all my clothes taken and the site up and running!!! I need to make some cash so I can hopefully open my store in real world soon!!

Lil man had his hot stove baseball league tournament on Saturday. L They lost. L
Ill have pics up this week.

He has Little League Championship game tomorrow. His team is undefeated!!! I am so excited.. I love that his coach has come up a few times to make sure Lil Man will be there… because “he is needed” on the time!! Love It!!!

Hope everyone is having a great week!!! J

Blessings N Love
Overthinking Mama 

Thursday, July 14, 2011

a phase... i hope.

My baby girl is going thru a phase… at least I am so hoping it’s a phase because if it’s long term.. I think I might go insane!!!

She wants me… all. The. Time. She has to be right on me.. me carrying her or her climbing on me. She wants to be by my side all the time… sleep with me at night… every night.  I am starting to feel overwhelmed. 

This past couple weeks has been the worst.  She hasn’t been listening to me… Shes been acting out…  Argueing non stop with her brother…  Throwing fits.  

I honestly don’t know what to do anymore… I feel horrible cuz I feel like I am going crazy.  I need a break.  I so wish her father would come by once in a while and take her for a night or hell even just a day, a couple hours… something!!

I am scared if I give into her she will end up like I was growing up… Needing to sleep with in my moms bed till I was like 12!! Yes… I said 12!! I had to always have someone there… Always…  Or at least fall asleep with someone there… Always. Even if it was a friend.  I had to have someone there. It all changed once I turned 12/13. I wanted to be alone as much as possible. Lol.
I am also scared that if I don’t give into her.. she will end up like that too… or will be constantly trying to find whatever it is she’s seeking now… and will find it in the wrong places.. like me too. Lol.

So I dunno what to do. Just pray. The Lord has helped me thru something similar with her before… so I know He will again…  Just right now… its frustrating.

I am exhausted.  I love her more than anything in the world… and I dunno what to do.

Blessings N Love
Overthinking Mama 

Wednesday, July 13, 2011

Tuesday, July 12, 2011

My- MAMA Style

My- MAMA Style

Shirt- Arizona-JC Penny's  $8.00
Undertank- $5.99
Jeans- Refuge-Charlotte Russe $34.99
Belt- Thrifted $1.99
Shoes- Thirfted $3.99

Blessings N Love
Overthinking Mama 

Friday, July 8, 2011

Realization Friday

Its Friday!! This week has gone so slow!!!  Seems like every day drags out like nothing else… wow… but honestly its been a pretty great week.  

Thank you for sharing your realizations!!

Here they are:

This week I have come to realize:

~ that the heart works in mysterious ways sometimes.

~ I love my BFF

~ I am addicted to thrift shopping

~ I am like a balloon… and I need someone that will keep me grounded in the Lord, otherwise I might drift off..

~ Its amazing how the love for one person can change your out look on other people

~ Headaches suck.

~ Fridays are the best!

~ God is so good to me… more than I deserve.

~ That I have the goofiest dog ever!!!  He jumps thru windows just to be with me!!!  - man i need to find a man like that!! lol. 

Blessings N Love
Overthinking Mama 

Thursday, July 7, 2011

my secret visitor

I walked in to my room the other day and there was Edward sitting on a chair, looming in my room, crying for me. Awe.

Sorry I haven't been blogging that much this week... I just really haven't had that much motivation to... I will try And be better at that.

Hope everyone has a blessed day.

Blessings n love
Overthinking Mama
Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Wednesday, July 6, 2011

My- MAMA Style

My- MAMA Style

Top- Target- $8.99
Capris- Thrifted- $4.99
Belt- Thrifted- $1.99
Shoes- Thrifted- $3.99

Blessings N Love
Overthinking Mama

Friday, July 1, 2011

Realization Friday

Its Friday. And a long holiday weekend for me. I am excited!! I will try and take lots of pics of everything to post next week.. (I am getting better with it!!) 

Tonight I have a Scentsy Party. I am excited!!  I hope it turns out well.

Here’s the realization for the week.

I’ve come to realize:

~ That I think the same things over and over again.

~ That I forget too quickly the realizations I have.

~ That some people just aint good friends…

~ That to him I am just a friends… to me- he has my heart.

~ That above line- will only be for a hot minute… cuz I know its time to move on.

~ That I fall in love with my kids more and more everyday!

~ The Lord is so good.

~ That sometimes it better to laugh it off and keep your mouth shut

~ That something I dwell on way more than others.

~ That it seems like some people in my life have copped an attitude. 

~ That it seems like if I can’t make a get together, party, or whatnot because of previous plans, my kids, or personal reasons… than I am not a good enough friend… and then my things ain’t good enough to come to either.  Or at least smart ass comments must be made when coming to my things.

~ That it kinda sucks that it seems like the men that want me either only want my body and not a relationship, are too young, don’t meet my standards or all of the above.

Thank you everyone for the realization you sent in this week!!! J
If you want your realization posted- send me an email

Have a wonderful Fourth!!!

Blessings N Love
Overthinking Mama